Tilly the Good Life

by Tilly Smith Dix

My beautiful, elegant sister has left this world and I’m relieved she will endure no further suffering. However, I will miss our heart-to-heart chats on Whatsapp, her unwavering support of my life journeys, her sanguine persona, and her wicked sense of humour.

I do hear her lovely voice and feel her light around me and this is certainly helping me process the passing of my soul sister, who was like a second mom, best friend, shopping buddy, girlie lunch pal, and all-round champion.

She was a beauty and her tall elegance got her noticed wherever she went. Her caring heart and a sense of fun had friends flocking first to our parents’ home and then to her own.

She was a great dancer and she loved to dance. One of my earliest memories was of her practising ballet in our lounge in George, when she lived with us after my folks moved from Pretoria. I was about four years old and wanted to join in, so, she taught me all the basic ballet positions. She was patient as I did cause trouble at times, tickling her feet when she was balancing on one leg! We’d both end up on the floor laughing. She also taught me to do the chacha. It was such fun!

Rina was not always an elegant beauty. She described herself as a tall, skinny teen with Wednesday legs, “wen’s day gonna break,” she’d laugh, and with her mop of thick golden brown curly hair, she preferred wearing our brother Johan’s old shirts with big shorts, and climbing trees with the boys. And then it all changed.  The duckling turned into a graceful swan. She loved fashion and was known for her sartorial elegance throughout her adult life.

I know she annoyed our eldest sister Lulu often when they were growing up together as she played tricks on Lulu simply to watch her squirm. A troublemaker. She was also physcially strong as when Lulu would try to get the better of her pest of a younger sister, Rina always ended up on top in a tussle, I’m told.

Rientjies, as I called her when I was little, would spoil me when she came to visit after she left our parent’s home and returned to Pretoria. I loved those visits. We were then living in the Eastern Cape and I would snuggle in behind her back at night. I’d also duck in there if I’d been cheeky and our mom wanted to spank me, when Rina would shield me. I got away with plenty when she was visiting!

Rina was fifteen when I was born and apparently carried me on her hip more than was necessary. Years later, when she was a mother of two, she had a back operation and joked it was because she carried me around too much when she was a teen. So, when I felt guilty about having contributed to her back problems and asked her what I could do to compensate during my visit, I’d be asked to trim her hair and fix her makeup. My debt was settled.

She could have been a Dior model or Miss World back in the day. She did a lot of ramp and photographic modelling work but it was always a part-time job, second to her working as a bank teller. She was my style icon. My earliest fashion memory was of her wearing a below the knee-length black woollen dress and black stiletto heels. The dress had long sleeves and she wore her hair up in a classic French twist. She looked like a movie star and I wanted to be just like her when I grew up! I was about 12.

Pictured above: Rina in the late fifties, she remained a beauty until her passing at age 85 on 11 March, 2024.

She was elated being a mother to her two children, Jaco and Anri. She had waited so long to have them. Fast forward, when her children were grown. She was a dutiful wife to husband Koot. Her grandchildren made her so proud.

Once one had tasted Rina’s oxtail or any of her culinary delights, one was ruined for life. Her creativity and love of cooking, just like our beloved mother, brought her enormous joy, embracing friends and family savouring every morsel at her table.

You left your mark, my darling sister, you will never be forgotten. I feel you near me, I remember your wisdom, I hear your laughter, and I see your magical smile. No more illness, suffering, and loss of dignity for a proud, strong, kind, loving, caring, beautiful lady.

Rest in peace and put in a good word for me. I know that reunion with our loved ones, parents, siblings and pets, is a jolly affair and I bet you are all sharing some amusing stories about the rest of us trying to make heads or tails of this journey called life. I hear laughter. Love you always and so grateful you were in my life.

Only six days after Rina’s passing, her frail husband Koot joined her after a long battle with illness, a trip to ICU in hospital, followed by paliative care for several weeks.

Koot had been in my life since I was two years old. He always brought ice cream treats. I remember him holding my hand walking me to school when I was six, not long after they were married. He sang beautifully and played the piano accordion back then! He often sang Waltzing Mathilda to me, as that was my given name. I think it is a beautiful thing him following Rina shortly after her death. Another joyful reunion. No more suffering, only peace…

Food and Entertainment

My Peninsula Hot Springs spa day, a generous and welcome gift certificate from my sweet family for my birthday in December, was shared with my fellow expat Aussie bestie. The dinner afterwards was scrumptious, and the tranquil view of the bubbling thermal spring stream with its pebbled foot-bathing feature, and the verdant flora, proved balm for the soul. The geothermal bathing, followed by a soothing back and head massage, and a deep-cleanse facial, almost put me to sleep.

Pictured above, an afternoon and early dinner at the Peninsula Hot Springs in Fingal.

The only fly in the proverbial (spa) ointment? A large, constantly belching guy at the next table. Counting blessings, I was not sharing a table with him, chuckles, as he’d have needed more than a spa treatment afterwards. I really did giggle, under my breath of course, and remembered what my father might have said, “not at this table, excuse yourself immediately!” Exactly.

Frankston Arts Centre, Respect, The Aretha Franklin story performed by an electrifying cast, with Angie Narayan, Australia’s own soul mama, in the sassy lead. Riveting, don’t miss this show when it comes to a city near you. Swaying to Natural Woman, Say A Little Prayer, Son of a Preacher Man, Sisters Are Doing It for Themselves, and Freeway of Love were just some of the highlights of this masterfully produced story of family, loyalty, love, loss and victories that comprised the life of Aretha, the Queen of Soul. Long live the queen, who died aged 76 in 2018. I believe she’d approve of this show, and the cast made me proud to be an Aussie.

Pictured above, from the top, Respect: The Aretha Franklin Story; the colours of the ocean on a walk after the show in Frankston.

Dining at Captn. Jack’s at Summerville Cove with some amazing friends, organised by our chief entertainment manager Rika, was a treat for the palate and the senses. It takes a lot to beat a convivial Sunday lunch.

My O’Connor butcher’s steak, served with smoked potato, shallots, and peas, was pure, succulent, pink in the middle bliss on a plate. My friends swooned over their respective duck leg pie, barramundi, and ricotta & spinach gnudi, served with summer squash, and macadamia beurre noisette.

Pictured above, clockwise from the top, duck leg pie and O’Connor steak at Captn. Jack’s; seared scallops on squid-ink rice at Tio Tapas; seared blue eye fish in clam chowder at The Waterfront; view of the Yarra River at The Waterfront.

Tio Tapas in Mornington offers delicious sharing plates, which I often favour. I was too hungry to take pictures but remembered to save some evidence for this blog. The seared scallops, served on squid-ink rice and aioli, pictured, prawns tossed in a creamy wine garlic sauce, served with pan de la casa, and seasoned calamari served with Spanish aioli, proved an ideal light early dinner.

A much overdue visit to the city to meet up with my delightful expat friends Rika and Len did not disappoint, again. Melbourne, even on a mild summer’s overcast day, delivered every nuance required to uplift the sadness of losing my beloved sister. We dined at The Waterfront, which delivered first-class service and cuisine. My choice of seared blue eye fish was served with mussels and clams, with a scrumptiously creamy clam chowder. We ordered sides of crispy shoe-string fries and roasted sweet potato. We agreed, whilst this is not a low-cost eatery, we got value for our buck, plus the bonus of the Yarra River gently flowing mere two metres from our table. I highly recommend it and a stroll along the river afterwards, a scene that is up there with scenic waterways in Europe. The other diners and passing tourists all looked as charmed as we were. A world-class location.

Wineries are plentiful, from the Yarra Valley to this gorgeous Mornington Peninsula. I’ve always found them pricey but worth the cash for a special occasion. However, a recent trip to the verdant Yarra Valley’s Zonzo for a birthday celebration proved over the top.

Sunday traffic was busy with city slickers wishing to escape to the Hills, and it took me an hour and 10 minutes to get there. No, I did not get lost, I know the way, I used to live in that valley. I was on antibiotics for an infection, so, I had a soft drink only. Two slices of small-plate pizza, about 3 large olives, two small slices of lamb and one roast potato cost me $80 as one of the celebratory party of about 14 adults and their offspring. The kids had fun as they could walk around in the extensive gardens, surrounded by spectacular vistas of the Yarra Ranges.

So, if you are planning a group lunch or dinner at a winery, make sure you and your guests know exactly what you are getting and what you are in for as we were unable to pay separately, so, the host had to collect cash from us as his credit card was charged. The joyful company and many hugs from the pixies were worth it, though.

Travel

Autumn in South Africa is a great time to go on safari. I’ve written about the always magical Tau Game Lodge so often, so, this time, I’m adding a link of a current review published by a travel blogger in South Africa, sharing her authentic recent experience: https://sincerelynoks.co.za/2024/03/13/tau-game-lodge-review-an-unforgettable-african-adventure/?…

Pictured above, the waterhole at Tau. Listening to the sounds of game trumpeting, roaring, tweeting, and barking their nocturnal supremacy, is pure safari bliss. This is Tau, the place of the lion.

The  Tau live webcam will keep you mesmerized on: http://taugamelodge.co.za/main-lodge/live-webcam/

The established five-star lodge is family-friendly, with a Tau Cubz Club for children, a dreamy Tau Spa Oasis, and a Conference & Events Centre, which is separate from the tranquility of the lodge. Eco-friendly, malaria-free, and just over an easy four-hour drive from Pretoria and Johannesburg – www.taugamelodge.co.za

Sofa spud

Prime Video

Expats, a limited series starring Nicole Kidman. It was melancholy and disappointing. I’d give this a 3-star rating.

The Menten Files is in Dutch and I chose not to have subtitles to test my ancient Dutch picked up at my gran’s knee. This story, in three parts, of a mass murdering Nazi who’s greed for art robbed from Jews in WWII, is riveting. I give this one 4 stars.

Lamborghini – the man behind the legend proved a good binge. His wish to beat long-time rival Enzo Ferrari, made Ferruccio Lamborghini a compelling rival. I’d give this one 4 stars too.

Binge

Feud, Capote vs The Swans, starring Tom Hollander, Naomi Watts, Calista Flockhart, Diane Lane, Demi Moore, Molly Ringwald, Chloe Sevigny, and Treat Williams in his final role before his death last year. Superb direction by Gus van Sant, and stellar performances in this limited series based on the story of Truman Capote’s betrayal of the crème de la crème of New York’s society ladies Babe Paley, Slim Keith, C.Z. Guest, Ann Woodward, Joanne Carson, and Lee Radziwill. I give this limited series 5 stars.

A documentary on the legendary club Studio 54 in 70s New York is a reminder that nothing is new! Spot the celebrities of that hedonistic era! Sex, drugs and rock ‘n roll, baby! Entertaining, I’d give it 3.5 stars.

Apple TV

The New Look, is a limited series about legendary fashion designers Christian Dior and Coco Chanel. Starring Ben Mendelson (versatile Australian actor), and the always delightful Juliette Binoche, this is not only a story about the halcyon days of fashion but also the complexities of WWII, and its aftermath. The heartbreaking stories, struggles, and choices these characters made make for a spellbinding show. I give this one 5 stars.

Netflix

Dog, stars Tatum Channing in this heartwarming story about a veteran K9. Their journey from Oregon County to San Francisco and Big Sur brought back joyful memories of my trips along that route years ago. If you love dogs, bring the tissues. I give this one 4 stars.

Love Guy Ritchie’s blockbuster movies, such as The Gentlemen? This is the reworked television production released this year. Be prepared for mind-blowing locations, old family money and British traditions, and larger than life characters. Theo James, Kaya Scodelario, Joely Richardson, Edward Fox and the entire cast deliver more than you’d bargain for. I give this one 4.5 stars.

The Monuments Men, directed by and starring George Clooney, Matt Damon, Hugh Bonneville, and Cate Blanchett, is based on real events. Protecting Europe’s art against art-thieving Hitler. I was hooked. I give it 4 stars.

Style file

Style over fashion, style over fads and trends. That’s my motto, which does not mean I will not acquire the odd new item here and there which I am not gifted with by some of the brands I adore, wink-wink…

I recently read up on my zodiac signs, which included the Chinese zodiac and I could not argue, blush. I can be fickle, especially when it comes to what I wear. I will own that characteristic as I’m a creative and expressive spirit and will wear exactly what I like, when I like and not subscribe to one specific style only.

In my current style article for Startsat60, I focus on how we are every woman. We comprise the complexities of our inner girl, the seductress, the career woman, the partner, the lover, the wife, the grandmother, and so much more. Often, we must conform as life at times demands we do so, therefore I believe our most authentic form of expression is in the way we present ourselves to us and to the world on any given day, depending on the occasion, time of day, and our mood.

When in doubt, stick to the classics. Build an outfit from monochrome items in the wardrobe. Neutral shades are easy and versatile. By adding accessories, and scarves are back in a big way for all seasons, we can add some pizzazz, our very own blend of glamour and vitality, to the look. Whilst binging on The New Look it came as no surprise that comfortable, chic wide-leg pants, so Coco Chanel, are back, whilst curve-enhancing midi dresses have never been out of style – think Dior!

Love black? Build style around it. Love white? Do the same. Prefer soft or darker earth tones? Go with it. Adding a pop of colour ups the ante so easily. In fact, on any given day, you could mix those monochrome shades together and add a focus point to the combination, like a belt, scarf, shoes, or handbag that comprises all three hues. A statement of authentic style.

Then there are days when we see the gypsy in us, or the girl who believes in fairy tales, or the sexy cougar. Embrace your mood and go with it.

Pictured above: building around basic pieces in neutral shades, adding a pop of colour, or going all the way with a bright boho culotte theme. Mixing different hues, such as shades of blue, is energising. Life is our stage, work that wardrobe! For more style ideas, see my latest monthly article @Startsat60 and follow me for daily fashion style on Instagram @Sixty_is_the_new_40

Cheers to the good life. We only live twice: once when we are young and ignorant, and again when we are older and at least a little wiser but not over…

By Tilly Smith Dix

To most of us, buying a home is our biggest investment, not only to make a healthy profit when the time comes for us to sell and move on, but also because it is our safe place, our sanctuary, the place where we wish to live in harmony. A place where we can create a lifestyle that becomes an escape from all the craziness of the world. A comfortable cocoon.

When our homely haven becomes a battlefield, it is up to us to identify the cause of such discontent and fix it. If the cause of that dark cloud over our home happens to be a bad relationship that cannot be salvaged, we part company and create a new happy place.

However, if the cause of our ongoing discontent in our home environment is a bad neighbour, we address the issue with intelligence and grace. When our valiant efforts are constantly thwarted, and our home no longer feels like a haven because of others’ disrespect for our property, or our person, we address the problem through the right channels.

If you live in a block of units, as I do, you address such  problems with the owners corporation management company, who would then liaise with the owners corporation committee.

Sadly, as many of us have experienced dealings with such committees and chairpersons, too many residential estates are badly managed, and mostly by some chairperson on a power trip, believing, if they’ve lived in a block for many years, they own the block.

This is where consumer councils play a major part as they also have a division that tends to owners corporation rules and should their advice fall on deaf ears when it comes to the management of such establishments, that council will refer the matter to VCAT (Victoria Civil Administrative Tribunal), the governing body for residential and corporate property disputes.

It was recently brought to my notice through the Consumer Council of Victoria that a committee of only two members, which includes the chairman, is not recognised, especially in a block of 14 units, comprising ten owners.

Yet, in this specific case, the chairman continues to have the final say in any matters brought to his notice by the management company for the estate! If such a chairman has been known to have had heated arguments with several residents through the years, with some disputes ending in physical punch-ups, surely, such a person should not be in control of a residential community!

Should the self-serving chairman have bullied people into doing things his way, yet he continues to break the rules of the block himself, he should surely be relieved of his position by the owners corporation.

A neighbour recently moved after renting her unit for some 12 years, of which the last seven years have proved hell for her and her young son. She lived in fear and stopped complaining about the criminal behaviour of a family that moved in across the road from her after they started harassing her, throwing dog faeces at her house, banging at her door, and calling her names.

Their reason? She complained about their noise, constant water flow down the common driveway towards her property from their non-stop car washing and seemingly mechanical workshop run from their garage. She also objected to their dog using her property as a toilet as the stench on her porch was appalling.

When she complained to her rental agency, they obviously communicated with the management company of the block. This resulted in her car number plates being stolen and her tyres slashed outside her garage!

When she advised her neighbour, the chairman of the owners committee, of this frightening behaviour, his response was to not complain or call the police as the bad behaviour of the offending family will escalate. Of course, this chairman also told other residents he did not address the offenders’ unacceptable behaviour as per the owners corporation rules as he did not wish his family to be targeted by them.

Since moving away for her and her son’s safety, this former resident now calls me regularly as she was aware of my ongoing problems with the family in question, who’d caused damage to my property and their dog, which is not registered with the local council, was using my property as a toilet, as it had done to hers.

The smell of urine and dog poop on my porch was disgusting and my security cameras picked up on their always off-leash Pitbull being the culprit. A friend once sent me flowers, which were trashed by the dog when left on my doorstep as I was in the shower at the time and unable to open the door to the delivery person!

When I asked these people to respect my property, things got worse and indeed escalated. They were throwing eggs and human faeces at my home! This resulted in an intervention order issued by the local court against the member of the family who caused earlier damage to my wall and nature strip.

My questions are: how could an owner be allowed to continue renting his property to such tenants when they are constantly in violation of the residential estate rules; how does a chairman and a home owners committee allow such behaviour to continue, turning a blind eye for many years as they do not wish to be involved; and how does an owners committee management company continue to take leadership from a committee of only two?

What do the police say? Move, as until we have proof of these known offenders doing the damage, we cannot do anything to assist! The police have had many conversations with these people, after which they do curb their destructive enthusiasm somewhat, but not for long. However, after some recent events, where vehicles with false registration numbers started causing deliberate damage to my pebbled nature strip, targeting my unit alone after a member of the lawless family took photographs of my nature strip’s position on the residential property, the police are now investigating. This could take time but surely, at some point, such people should be brought to book as they create an unsafe environment for everyone else on the block, many of them with young children.

As we say in my land of origin, how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. It will take time addressing these issues through the correct channels but this owner is not selling in the current dipped market! I’d have to sell for less than I purchased my home just over two years ago and moving to another neighbourhood would certainly require more capital, which I don’t have unless I sell for a realistic price.

Realtors I trust and have dealt with for some years advise me my property looks better than any of the other units in my block but unless the other home facades are presented as well as mine, the value of my home will remain lower! As an owner paying a levy, which has now almost doubled since acquiring the property just over two years ago, I have every right to seek professional action.

As for sleeping with the enemy, I wake up to birdsong in my bijou garden in my ongoing quest to have a happy haven, instead of constantly being reminded of these disrespectful people living only metres from my front door.

I have landscaped the front garden of my property, which is essentially owners corporate common property, at my own cost and approved by the then bigger committee as I was told by the esteemed chairman the owners corporation did not promise to maintain this common property area! Yet, it is stipulated in the rules and maintenance therefor is included in the quarterly levy!

The offensive neighbours continue to throw items at my roof, such as old dog toys, running shoes, and other objects, so, I don’t even bother to get up when I hear bump in the night anymore! I’d like to add I do not interact with them at all!

I endeavour to deal with these obstacles in a mostly sanguine manner, by focusing on my lovely friends, writing jobs, my family, living life, and the charming private garden I’ve created, where a thrush couple is nesting in one of my hanging pot plants! These birds are so trusting, I’m allowed to water the plant carefully as I don’t wish to wet them or their remaining nestling!

I’m keeping an eye on the ravens and typical (Indian) mynas trying to interfere with the nest as I suspect two chicks were taken by a marauding raven as I heard a commotion whilst the ravens seemingly had the upper hand when Mr and Mrs Thrush were so bravely defending their home. I know how they feel!

Observing the dedication of the male thrush in delivering food to his nestling and relieving Mrs Thrush of her nest duty so she could forage for food and bath in the birdbath, is commendable. I know of some humans who could take lessons from Mr Thrush. He is a true gentleman.

He valiantly chases off the enemy and I feel privileged to have gained the trust of these sweet songbirds. They know I won’t harm them as when I chase the scavenger birds, they seem to know I’m not chasing them as they stay put on my veranda. Smart little birds.

This seems like dejavu as years ago, I had a similar couple of thrushes nesting on my patio in Sandton, South Africa! So, there is much pleasure to treasure in nature when humans show their dark side…

Pictured above: The thrush family, my roses, and Kiki takes time to smell the roses.

I hear Joan of Arc calling but I’m damned if I’ll be burned at the stake. This is 2023, not 1431, and I’m trying to keep my faith in the Universe, the law, the system, and karma!

Speaking of Mr Thrush, it is heartening to see men who respect women and believe in doing the right thing. I recently watched Hugh Grant being interviewed, and he stood up for Prince Harry leaving the UK. He recalled how Harry as a young boy saw the British tabloid media try to destroy his mother and the vile paparazzi playing their part in her death. “As a man, a husband, and a father, it is Harry’s job to protect his family, so he did the right thing moving to the US,” he said.

I’ve always liked Hugh. Okay, there was that dreadful night in LA with a stranger who was not so divine, but he was so much younger then, and has obviously grown plenty over the years, now a father and husband. I like his forthrightness and he might be socially awkward at awards events as he does not care a hoot about ‘whom’ he is wearing – it’s a suit and he bought it! Go, Hugh!

I think I’m going to ask him to come sort out my residential problems… he might know people! Calling Mickey Blue Eyes… or how about Denzel Washington as The Equalizer?

Showtime

Moulin Rouge at the Regent Theatre in Collins Street, Melbourne, proved a triumph in every theatrical and musical sense. I was a tad concerned it might not live up to the superb film of 22 years ago, starring Nicole Kidman and Ewan McGregor, not to mention Richard Roxburgh and Jim Broadbent, but it ticked all the boxes and I bet Baz Luhrmann approved.

The song choices were sensational, featuring Rolling in the Dark by Adele, Heroes by David Bowie, Bad Romance by Lady Gaga, and of course, the always titillating Lady Marmalade by Labelle and much more. I thought Des Flanagan was completely believable as I watched his character of Christian changing from an innocent new bohemian dreamer in Montmartre, to a more self-assured young man in love. Alinta Chidzey was a coquettish Satine but I have to be honest, the character lacked the vulnerability reflected in the movie role, so beautifully portrayed by the then ethereal Nicole Kidman.

Pictured above: Melbourne, a green city of culture, style, and great theatre.

Pot-Pourri at my nearby Frankston Arts Centre proved a most delightful way of spending a Friday lunchtime. Extracts from Westside Story, Man of La Mancha, Carmen, Cats, Chicago, Turandot, Cabaret, la Traviata, Les Miserables, Phantom of the Opera, and songs by Leonard Cohen, Andrea Bocelli, and Josh Groban were superbly performed by a stellar ensemble.

The professional group comprises: soprano Tania de Jong, who is also a global speaker and social entrepreneur, having performed in some 40 countries; soprano Rebecca Bode, who was a full-time soloist with the Victorian State Opera and later with Opera Australia, having performed worldwide – she is also the MD of MTA Entertainment and Events; tenor Jonathan Bode, who is an allrounder of international acclaim in theatre, musicals and opera; baritone Jonathan Morton also has a BSc in chemistry, whilst being an IT whiz and plays the didgeridoo. He has performed with the Victoria State Opera and in major musicals, and he is a director of MTA Entertainment and Events, as well as Pot-Pourri; pianist Joyce was the perfect accompanist as she did not try to outplay the vocalists, the sign of a true professional.

A Christmas Carol at the Comedy Theatre on Exhibition Street in the city was sensational. A powerful reminder of how ghosts persuaded Scrooge to change his miserly, miserable ways! (I’d like to get in touch with those spirits, perhaps this is my grownup Christmas wish, to make the bad neighbours turn into nice people, ha!)

The smash-hit production of Charles Dickens’ classic was adapted for the stage by Jack Thorne. Owen Teale as Scrooge was dramatic, powerful, and riveting. Superbly supported by a magnificent cast, I’d like to mention the adorable little Mira Feldman as Tiny Tim. The musicians and orchestration simply blew my mind too.

The Archibald Prize 2023 touring exhibition at the Mornington Civic Reserve was captivating. The exhibition captures the public imagination like no other, and I liked how it showcased Young Archie in the foyer gallery, celebrating the art of local students. The exhibition features public figures and cultural identities from all walks of life, reflecting stories of our times.

A delightful Sunday spent with my lovely relative Helen, wife of my cousin Jason, and mom of my beloved pixies. She has a degree in art and to teach in Australia, she had to obtain her Masters, which she has now done! No mean feat with a husband in corporate and three kids at school. This exhibition proved a marvellous eye-opener into the art world of our new country.

Pictured above: Head in the sky, feet on the ground by Julia Gutman, the Archibald Prize 2023 winner; geese near the lake at the Mornington Civic Reserve.

Fabulous food

Recent visits to the city affirmed that Melbourne is a dining mecca. My choice of coq au vin (blanc) of course is a French classic and I broke my rule of never eating chicken when dining out and I’m thrilled I ordered the braised free-range chicken, button mushrooms lardons, with baby potatoes in a rich wine reduction as it was sublime! When in Paris… okay, this is Melbourne, but Bistrot d’Orsay is situated in the chic quarter of Collins Street, where any fashion-loving Francophile could have their pick of exquisite eateries.

My friends agreed, the dish was as good as any one of us ever tasted in France, and I was told the risotto comprising a wild mushroom ragout, parmesan, and truffle oil, was scrumptious too. On a second occasion I opted for the steak frites, which was tasty, complete with café de Paris butter, but it was more of a minute steak, rather thin.

Two delightfully convivial occasions were savoured, once with a glass of Veuve Clicquot Brut, and during the second lunch a week later, we sampled the Howard Park Petit Jete bubbles from WA. It was so poignantly reminiscent of long-ago trips to France, I almost started humming The Marseillaise…

Situated across the road from the Regent Theatre, this bistrot could become a habit. Santé!

Pictured above: Bistrot d’Orsay, coq au vin, and Betty’s Burgers.

Betty’s Burgers is easy for fast dining with a modern take on the American diner-style eateries so typical of yesteryear. The brioche rolls are fresh and feather light. The lobster roll with a side of fries proved an ideal light meal, accompanied by a glass of prosecco before the evening performance of A Christmas Carol at the Comedy Theatre next door!

Sofa spud

Moving On, on Binge, starring Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin, Malcolm McDowell and Richard Roundtree is easy to watch and I of course loved Jane Fonda’s wardrobe. A mature lesson in karma. I loved this movie released in 2022.

Still on Binge, I watched an old Jane Fonda movie, starring a young Robert Redford, and Willie Nelson, The Electric Horseman. They don’t make them like this anymore, a 1979 gem. I recently watched Jane and Robert in a movie about romance for seniors, Our Souls at Night but to be honest, I preferred their 1979 film as I was disappointed in the recent storyline, which did not blow my skirt up, wink-wink…

Franco Zeffirelli was legendary, and I was too young to see The Taming of the Shrew when it was released in 1967, starring Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. Wow, those two had chemistry! Check it out on SBS On Demand.

The Wolf of Wallstreet released ten years ago, is still an incredible story of our times and brilliantly produced by Martin Scorsese and Leonardo DiCaprio. Based on the book by Jordan Belfour and starring Rob Reiner, Margot Robbie, Matthew McConaughey, and Leonardo DiCaprio, I was hooked. I knew of people like that during my time in financial markets years ago!

Documentaries I’ve enjoyed on Binge include: Untouchable, the life of Harvey Weinstein; Natalie Wood – What Remains Behind, sensitively produced by her daughter Natasha – a Hollywood tragedy and mystery, gone too soon; Europe’s Waterways is a 5-part series and it goes beyond just the glamour and fun of travel. It covers biodiversity, good souls taking care of nature, white wild horses, black cattle, birdlife, and the heartfelt conservation of fish. Starting in the Camargue, up the Rhone River, past Arles, and ending in Poland, this was pure armchair therapy of places I’ve loved to visit in the past and a pleasant education on destinations I was not familiar with.

Summer safari

When summer unfolds its glorious sunshine, game born in spring is already sure-footed and confident, often peppered with some new-found attitude. Wild plants that flourish in summer, now attract migrating birds that follow the sun.

The African bush is bursting with wildlife, which is a magical time to visit five-star Tau Game Lodge in the Madikwe Game Reserve, where conservation is key.

Sustainable, eco-friendly, prolific wildlife, malaria-free, the Big Five and all the smaller game in-between, with some 27 major species roaming free in this natural habitat safeguarding nature for future generations, contribute to making Tau a bucket-list safari destination.

Pictured above: a Standard Chalet overlooking the waterhole at Tau Game Lodge.

Early morning safaris are spectacular, offering magical light for photography, with a pitstop for coffee and delicious snacks.

Tau is pure, understated 5-star luxury and family-friendly, offering a Cubz Club for children, baby-sitting services, and special safaris and education for youngsters, affording the adults some quality safari, leisure, and Tau Spa Oasis time, and a Conference & Events Centre.

The Tau Summer 2023/4 packages start from R34,265 per couple for two nights.

Be mesmerized on: http://taugamelodge.co.za/main-lodge/live-webcam/

Just over an easy four-hour drive from Pretoria and Johannesburg – www.taugamelodge.co.za

Style for the holidays

It’s that time of year and a great time to do an annual spring clean. I’ve done half of it, taking items in good nick to the opshop (charity/opportunity shop). I’m meticulous about what I get rid of as I mostly acquire items that don’t date fast. Quality lasts and I tell myself I’m being kind to the environment by looking after clothes and accessories, buying only if it will complement at least three items in my existing wardrobe.

I’m about to pack the heavy winter clothes away and place little sachets of cloves and salt in tissue paper to keep garments from getting damp in the big suitcase used for such seasonal rotations. The cloves keep bugs away and smell so much better than mothballs! Remember grandma’s old cupboard laden with mothballs? Eek!

So, before I dash off to find suitable outfits for the Holidays, leisurewear, and glam shiny items to celebrate in, I look at what is already in the wardrobe. I also rediscover items I’d retired temporarily – it’s like acquiring something new but you know what to do with it the second, or third, time around!

When I unpack such items, I immediately know if it’s going to make a statement and put me in a festive mood, or, if it has finally reached its sell-by date. In other words, I will never wear it again for several reasons, often, simply because it no longer suits my style, or, it really is never going to make a style comeback, or it is not as flattering as I remembered it!

Toss it in the bag and know it will make someone else happy to acquire the previously loved pieces, plus, proceeds of the sale at the opshop will go to a charitable cause. This is the time to be mindful of those less fortunate than us.

Still wearing old leather pants? The cut has improved over the years and if we don’t have the budget to acquire new leather items, the coated denim that has blithely snuck into the fashion world over the past few years easily passes for real leather, and it is so much more affordable. I love the comfortable fit and decided the leather and thick suede pants I’ve treasured for some 20 years are just not comfortable! When I dropped these off at Vinnies, I knew someone else would be happy to wear these quality garments.

Of course, this created some space in the closet, which resulted in my happily accepting gorgeous new items of my choice from some of the incredible Australian brands that provide me with their fashion to promote on Instagram.

I do declare, I am a sucker for cotton, linen, and silk shirts, as they are so versatile for styling for most occasions. I’ve banged on about big shirts for some time and recently wrote about it in my monthly style article for @Startsat60 online magazine as big shirts are fabulous to style with, plus, they are so forgiving if we gain a little holiday curve here and there…

Ah, and this being The Season, there is always the shimmer and bling. Whilst I’ve never gone a bundle on too many scintillating garments, I stick to one item as the focus piece to complete a party look, building the outfit around it. Perhaps a top, pants, skirt, jacket, or shoes.

Pictured above: Holiday dressing made easy. Basic items to build a look from day, to evening, to festive cheer. Big shirts are easy, shimmer is fab in moderation, and denim, silk, and linen are always reliable pieces to mix and match. I’m loving the hues of blue, pink, and green. The joyfulness of the Fella Hamilton Sandy Stretch pull on jeans and Collared Suzy Stretch denim jacket in mint gets my vote for versatile holiday style.

Happy Holidays, and cheers to the goodlife, wishing you and yours all you need. We all need a little more kindness by year-end, so, I’m starting the season by being kinder to myself too.

I hear someone whispering, “so difficult to be kind to some of the thorny relatives we have to see this time of year,” and here’s hoping my technique of dealing with those difficult people we simply cannot bring ourselves to adore, will help you too. I greet them and smile, hug, wish them well, but I always have my eye on someone I enjoy chatting to as the escape plan, waving at them overtly, excusing myself from the grumpy one, and then happily settling into having fun with the kinder people.

I do this on arrival so the dutiful job is done and dusted as the day or evening progresses – I might lose my pose later when the bubbles start playing tricks with my graciousness, hie!  May the fat man in the red suit be a sweetheart… Cheers!

By Tilly Smith Dix

It’s mind-blowing what some people will say on social media, in fact, in any media. There is so much toxic spill, one could not be surprised at the great divide of the world, seemingly more so than ever, caused by anger, ignorance, and hate.

I’ve realised it is not good for my psyche to see and hear the constant vitriol uttered about other people, mostly, and too often about strangers. A beloved friend of many years, now living back in Germany after spending most of her adult life in South Africa, messaged me with a thank-you note for my mostly positive posts and messages. “Why,” she said, “is the world fighting wars they don’t understand, using such foul language, taking pleasure in harm caused to others, and with zero tolerance or respect for anyone.” I could not agree more.

The role models we had and the respect our parents instilled in us for our fellow man, woman, animal and nature, graciousness, the ability to hear what others have to say, and those good manners we were lectured about since Pa fell off the bus… what happened?

I’m no prude and anyone who knows me well will attest, I can drop an f-bomb when properly riled up and mostly if I have an appreciative audience, (said with a side-eye spark). I also have a voice and when necessary, I can stand up and roar louder than the bully trying to intimidate me. I was taught to do that too! Being gracious does not mean we have to be pushovers.

My point is simply, where did it all go wrong. When did people become so irascible? I’ve had my share of trolls making nasty remarks on social media and I refuse to engage in such mudslinging as I no longer take it personally. They don’t know me!

I believe in second chances, so, a troll gets one more chance, but I’ll respond to that first jab with grace if it’s not too nasty, while silently putting them on notice… the next time a follower or so-called social media friend says something nasty, I block and unfriend them. Life is too short to waste on embittered, ignorant, and malicious fools. Our own mental health is key.

Being at this age where men apparently merely age and women are mostly believed to just get old, the never-ending topic has become tired – why fight about how we choose to age? Some people resign themselves to the fact they are over and that is their choice.

Others, like so many of my tribe around the world, have carved new careers for themselves, against many odds, not only to continue earning but to keep their minds occupied, and make the most of the years they have left on this earth.

I call it keeping the old person out and I’m privileged to know several incredible people who feel the same. Some lost the battle far too soon and were taken away by sudden illness, yet they left their mark and will not be forgotten.

Then, there are people fighting cancer, jumping through hoops, and enduring endless surgeries and treatments to stay in this world, where they know they still have plenty of value to offer, as well as lessons to learn.

I’d like to salute them, and their supportive partners, for being strong, determined, kind, caring, and fighting the good fight to stay relevant until that final bell tolls.

A dear friend was lamenting signs of a sagging neck and jawline a while back, to which her husband, not much older than her, quipped: “Nobody notices these signs of ageing on you until you draw attention to it. I see the whole picture of you, and I think you’re still hot!” Give that man a Bell’s… my late mom would have quipped, with her impish chuckle, “that mouth deserves jam,” and I could not agree more.

As for the trolls who enjoy bringing others down for no better reason than simply being toxic, I’m savouring my chats and outings with my positive pals, where we celebrate life and each other, laugh at ourselves and with each other, and embrace the privilege to still be alive and mobile. Life could change in a flash. Gratitude and a smile are free mood-enhancers. Try it!

Starting the day in the right frame of mind is my focus. I often put on some vintage Santana and dance while I do my hair, makeup and choose my outfit as music will set the mood, and secondly, the dancing will keep the joints oiled as goodness knows, all those supplements that make me rattle after breakfast are not enough, ha!

A yoga teacher once told our class to imagine a white protective shield around us and to extend that imaginary shield to protect our families too.

I disagree about bad things only happening to bad people. Sadly, life happens but even when we seek justice and fair play, we don’t need to do it with malice and arrogance as then we are as toxic as those who inflict it.

I see one of my favourite actors, Sir Michael Caine, is retiring from his illustrious career. His mantra of working with the difficulty to overcome tough times so resonates with me. So, don’t be like Alfie, be more like Michael… learn, grow, be better, and grow old any which way you want to, but just be nice! Now I could also imagine Sir Michael adding, “or sod off,” in his delightful Cockney accent.

Out and about

Between Us on Maling Road, Canterbury, remains a favourite and the lobster, prawn, avocado and egg on sourdough breakfast is still heavenly. However, as the eatery no longer serves champagne by the glass, my friends and I sauntered across the road after our meal and discovered the newly opened Lennox Wine bar/shop, where our respective cravings for bubbles and a hearty local chardonnay were met with a welcoming smile by the friendly proprietor.

Pictured above, calamari salad, and prawn lobster egg breakfast at Between Us, and Lennox Wine Bar Shop on charming Maling Road, Canterbury.

Attending my first Twilight Sunset Frankston Boardwalk Market here on the Mornington Peninsula was a thrill. Well-organised, scrumptious food freshly prepared in front of you, art, accessories, fashion, homewares, local produce, and delicious locally distilled alcoholic beverages sold in bottles or cans, proved a therapeutic outing between 5 and 9pm on a Friday.

The Lime & Ginger Gin with Sparkling Apple by Eddie & Organic Bay of Red Hill & Bonbeach proved addictive! Glad I brought the second can home to savour on ice as the first one was my limit for driving home, I’m certain! I did sing a little louder in the car on the way home. Just blame vitamin sea and gin… and if any passers-by thought the woman in the car, bobbing her head and opening her mouth like a guppy was high, they’d be right! I’m high on being alive.

Pictured above, Frankston Sunset Twilight Boardwalk Market, where Kananook Creek runs into the bay, and dear well-informed local tourism friend Rika on a perfect spring evening.

The Boardwalk was abuzz with families and their beloved pets, not to mention the boating community sailing down Kananook Creek into the bay, some even rowing with their dogs on the bow, complete with pet safety jackets! I saw no pets stressed or harmed in the process.

On this mild spring evening, the beach was busy and the atmosphere bursting with bonhomie, further enhanced by some of the local musicians. I’m looking forward to the next event and congratulate the organisers on a job well done. I’m chuffed to call Frankston my local council.

As for delicious dining, I’ve featured The Rocks in Mornington before, and Waves on the Beach in Frankston, my two preferred seaside eateries. So, to avoid being accused of accepting kickbacks from these restaurants, I’ll not do a detailed review for now… but watch this space!

However, suffice to say, the Sunday evening paella to share at The Rocks, and the seafood linguini at Waves, are my obsessions as I just keep returning for more… add delicious local or French bubbles, and all is well with the world! More singing on the way home… but I do drink responsibly as life is precious!

Pictured above, twilight at The Rocks in Mornington.

Travel

Summer safari magic in South Africa

When summer unfolds its glorious sunshine, game born in spring is already sure-footed and confident, often peppered with some new-found attitude. Flora that flourish in summer, now attract migrating birds that follow the sun.

The African bush is bursting with wildlife, which is a magical time to visit five-star Tau Game Lodge in the Madikwe Game Reserve, where conservation is key.

Sustainable, eco-friendly, with prolific wildlife, malaria-free, the Big Five, and all the smaller animals in-between, with some 27 major species roaming free in this natural habitat, the owners are safeguarding nature for future generations.

Then there is the birdlife. From regulars like grey and blue herons, kingfishers, fish-eagles, and the like, to migrating spur-winged geese, choose this haven bordering Botswana as their annual breeding home.

Ever seen an African wild dog and her young basking in the morning sun, or a lioness and her cubs lazily rolling in the savannah after feasting the previous night?

Fast-forward to lunchtime when guests are dining with a wide-angle view of the large waterhole. In the heat of the day, animals, like humans, must quench their thirst and all you need to do is dine on delicious food, sip your preferred summer mid-day tipple, and watch the pecking order at the waterhole…

Pictured above, summer safari magic at Tau Game Lodge, (images supplied).

All the chalets, including the standard chalets, offer sublime vistas of the waterhole. Join other equally enthusiastic guests on the hospitality decks, or choices of two swimming pools, all offering views of the entertaining Tau waterhole. You are bound to spot a crocodile creating some drama too…

Dinner is often served in a different location, depending on the weather. Be it on the Dining Deck, Restaurant or Boma, you are never far from the waterhole, where the wild sounds of the night will astound you.

Tau Game Lodge opened its 5-star safari doors in 1995 and offers 30 rooms, from updated Luxury Standard & Standard Chalets, to Family Suites. Family-friendly, with a Tau Cubz Club for children, the Tau Spa Oasis, and a Conference & Events Centre. Eco-friendly and malaria-free – www.taugamelodge.co.za

Ski and spa in the Dolomites

Located amid the heady heights of the Dolomite Mountains of Northern Italy, Adler Spa Resort Dolomiti is an idyllic ski and spa destination. This welcoming mountain resort offers a range of alpine activities that are steeped in tradition and the wild South Tyrolean landscapes. 
 
The daily complimentary sports activity programme, including guided hikes, e-biking, and Nordic walking, as well as yoga and fitness classes, will help you work off the delicious food, and backpacks, telescopic poles, and maps are provided free of charge. Snowshoeing, ice climbing, cross-country skiing, and tobogganing are available on request for an additional fee.
 
One of the main draws of this region is the incredible Dolomiti Superski, which boasts a variety of pistes, and 450 state-of-the-art ski lifts, with two located at the resort. You’ll also find the Ortisei Ski School, just a four-minute walk away, which is suitable for all ages and abilities. Child-friendly services include the Ski School Ortisei offering personal pick-up and drop-offs for children.

Pictured above, the Adler Spa Resort Dolomiti

If you visit between 15-16 December 2023 you’ll get to witness the world-renowned Ski World Cup Val Gardena, where the greatest ski champions compete in two breathtaking races.

Regular rail connections from Milan, Venice, and Munich, while the airports of Innsbruck and Vale are less than a two hour drive away, make for a luxe, convenient location –  www.adler-resorts.com

Sofa spud

Binge:

The World’s Massive Engineering Mistakes, starting with the Leaning Tower of Pisa. I remember it being under renovation, with soil being pumped out and scaffolding keeping it together when I visited years ago. It was, after all, built on a swamp!

The series covers ancient and modern architectural mistakes, from biblical engineering required to protect Venice against tidal surges, to the Baltimore Road collapse in the US, Manhattan’s 601 on Lexington adjacent to St Peters Church, and London’s Millennium Bridge, which had been stabilised the last time I visited. Fascinating that even today, engineers make mistakes.

Still on Binge, Great Canal Journeys with veteran actress Sheila Hancock and former UK MP and broadcaster Gyles Brandreth, and Prunella Scales and Timothy West traversing the waterways of London and further through Britain and Europe on narrow boats. Informative and funny, I can’t wait to see more!

Fancy old-fashioned romcoms? I loved The Thrill of it All, starring the late great Doris Day and James Garner. They just don’t make them like that anymore …

The House of Maxwell, an eye-opening documentary, also on Binge, explains plenty about Ghislaine Maxwell, a daddy’s girl, who worshipped he who should not be named and is no longer with us after his sudden death in jail. Robert Maxwell, who also died under mysterious circumstances, was obsessed with being more powerful than Rupert Murdoch. I recall reading about such megalomaniacal characters in Jeffrey Archer’s book The Fourth Estate and having worked in publishing for many years, not much surprised me. However, I was shocked by plenty other revelations in this documentary. Riveting.

Netflix:

Love is in the Air, starring Delta Goodrem, is a light-hearted and well-produced current movie and proved a sweet diversion after a trying day! Our Delta recently performed with Kiss at the AFL Grand Final 2023 and they were all sensational! Those guys still rock and were a pleasure to watch being Interviewed on Seven pre-AFL.

Who Killed Jill Dando is a documentary produced in 2023 about the mysterious murder of TV personality and public UK darling Jill Dando. I recall meeting with editors in London not long after this murder and they were reeling from the shock, urging me not to walk in the street, even in Fulham, Chelsea, and Battersea Gardens, after dark!

The Couch Trip, another oldie from 1988, starring Dan Aykroyd and Walter Matthau, is still hilarious! I remember seeing it back then in a cinema and watching it again brought back happy memories. Walter Matthau did not even need to speak to get me giggling – that face! I’m sure he has the angels in stitches up There.

Prime:

Tuscan Wedding is about a Dutch wedding in Italy. I loved listening to my grandmother’s language, which she taught me before I turned five. I also recall enjoying Egyptian food and beer in Amsterdam, which is the only time I tried to speak Dutch since I was a little girl! As for Tuscany, always a good idea. Scenic, beautiful people, and often hilarious, I recommend this movie for unwinding with a glass of delicious…

The Lives of Saints, filmed in 2004, based on the novel by Nino Ricci, stars Sophia Loren, Nick Mancuso, Jessica Pare, and Fab Filippo. A film about silver linings and second chances. Superb.

SBS on Demand:

The 1988 movie Without a Clue, starring Michael Caine, Ben Kingsley, and Peter Cooke, is a hilarious spoof on Sherlock Holmes and our dear Watson, the latter being the actual brain of the duo! Damn Moriarty, ha!

Apple TV:

Morning Wars Season 3 is hot! Watch out for Mr Mad Men John Hamm and Jennifer Anniston in episode 6 – electric chemistry! As for Billy Crudup, this is his gig, he owns plenty of this show. Can’t wait for Friday…

Style it up with colour and nautical vibes

My preference for nautical stripes has never diminished. Enter the Charter Stripe Stud-neck top @fella_hamilton and I’m back on the Riviera in spirit!

I bang on about versatile fashion but seriously, it’s amazing how one well-chosen item could liven up many old wardrobe items. Do I hear panache, confidence, and charisma? Heck yes, when we feel good, we own it!

Speaking of stripes, I’ve also always had a penchant for striped shirts. They are often regarded as a masculine look, however, when we are in touch with our inner diva, we make it our own! One could always wear a silky camisole or floral scarf to emphasise our feminine vibes, right?

Wearing vertical stripes will mostly create a slimmer silhouette, but I’m not bashing horizontal lines, especially if they are on the parts of our bodies which we know are slimmer than the rest. Going stripy all the way? Then I’d suggest the thinner stripes are worn on our bits which we wish to minimise, with the wide stripes emphasising the rest. Not sure? Wear whatever makes you feel fabulous as confidence will outshine any of our body flaws!

Pictured above, from top left: the versatile nautical charter Stripe Stud Neck Top in pic 1 and 2 from Fella Hamilton; the big striped shirt; styling with my old pink silk shirt and coated linen jacket, from matching hue in current blush pink pants to the hot chocolate top and skirt from Decjuba, which works well with any colour, even the vintage soft orange pashmina; going green, mixing it up, old with new pistachio green cargo pants and matching knit top at Witchery Fashion; adding some glitz with a vintage camisole and bustier, changing an outfit from lunch to dinner effortlessly with some shimmer heels. Spot the same items on repeat, changing the mood and look.

October is cancer awareness month and whilst I regard every month in that light, the pink for cancer drive by Australian designer Fella Hamilton is very dear to my heart. A percentage of October sales of the Breton Squash & Wash Hat and the KE Design microfibre tea towel by @kedesignau goes to the Cancer Council and the Breast Cancer Network Australia – the month is not over yet, so let’s support the good fight!

Pictured above, pull-on pink jeans, Breton squash and wash hat, hot pink T-shirt, soft floral scarf, and micro-fibre tea towel, all from Fella Hamilton, for cancer research.

Cheers to the goodlife… let’s be nice to ourselves and to others…

by Tilly Smith Dix

Wearing our character lines like a badge of honour and allowing ourselves to display our emotions on our faces, and with grace, is a gift. I remember my darling mom telling me to stop pulling funny faces behind her back (I then believed she had eyes in the back of her head), as it would remain like that when the clock strikes!

Years later, I was reminded of this wisecrack when sexy Samantha of Sex and the City was telling a worried Carrie not to frown as when she starts ageing, it would show, demonstrating how her own forever upturning facial expressions would age so much better, thereby reducing wrinkles. It was funny at the time. Now I see her point.

The new norm for us to become carbon copies of people who have changed their appearances to such an extent, they’d need to be reintroduced to their parents, does not appeal to me.

Of course, people should make the most of their appearance if they wish. Hook nose? Buck teeth, a lazy eye, a wattle neck far too early in life? However, drawing that fine line between improvement, a gentle nip and tuck, and the ridiculous, should be mandatory and surgeons who encourage those grotesque makeovers should be brought to book as their greed is turning chronically insecure people into freaks. I find it disturbing and heartbreakingly sad.

I recently saw a clip of an acceptance speech during the 1987 Emmys by the late great Rue McClanahan of Golden Girls fame. When she first tried to get into the movie business, she was told she was not photogenic enough for television.

Years later, when she won the Outstanding Actress award, she said: “Every kick is a boost. I won’t mention who kicked me…. but you’ll be in the book!” Yes, I guess she had some cosmetic work done over the years, in that business it’s often compulsory but she still looked authentic. My point? Be you and know your worth!

By a certain age, we all show proof of life in our faces and bodies. Sad eyes, laughter lines, worry lines, frown lines. I knew a handsome man years ago who did not like his teeth as they were not even, yet still attractive. Once his teeth were remodelled to movie-star perfection, he decided he did not like his slight frown lines and laughter lines, so, he had a full facelift. The surgeon tucked his face so tight, he had a permanent grin, with eyes that looked perpetually startled, and one of the man’s friends remarked he looked as if he had been driving against the wind at high speed in his convertible Mercedes for too long.

He went from handsome, with some gorgeous character lines and the beginning of a silver-fox appeal in his early forties, to the ridiculous! He also admitted that he was unable to close his eyes now, so, he wore shades to bed otherwise he could not sleep, even in a dark room.

His girlfriend felt he had now shed at least 20 years of his life, so, she had a facelift and a startling 20cm added to her already generous chest size. Were they happier? No! They split up soon after, perhaps realising they were not unhappy because of the way they looked but the way they felt!

The latest “I look my age” movement does not sit well with me either as I believe it encourages ageism. Do I want to look my age? No! Yes, I want to look good and wear my lifelines with grace, but categorising age and beauty is becoming a tad tired. Just be! Men and woman looking good at any age should suffice. Dame Judy Dench, Emma Thompson, Harrison Ford and Pierce Brosnan are looking naturally great, who cares about their actual age? It’s just a number!

Beauty in our youth is mostly taken for granted and we are lucky if we have good genes. We only appreciate those as we age but life knocks us about and try as we might to deal with it the best way we could, some have more hardships and messy stitches in their tapestry of life, especially when it involves their physical and mental health.

My point is to keep it real. I had several cosmetic procedures many years ago after an assault when I asked a street vendor to replace the broken small foldup table, which he’d sold me the previous day. He did not like me demanding such service, whilst I was naïve enough to believe the Zimbabwean man would be fair, so, when I insisted, he hit me in the face.

The pain of having facial bones reconstructed, involving five surgeries over three years, was no fun but I had no choice! I was not going to go through life with a fractured nose and cheekbone.

I have delicate bones as I’m petite and once these procedures were complete, a cowboy cosmetic surgeon  (he was struck off the medical roll some years later for being a cokehead and allowing his nurses to perform procedures he should have done), not the caring surgeon who had operated on me, tried to coerce me into having Botox as it would even out the discrepancy in my cheeks post-surgery. I declined. I also declined further surgery as I sort of liked my face not being perfect. I just wanted to look normal.

Ageing is not for sissies, but we could add a little grace to the mix. Too many fillers and wearing enough makeup to sink the Titanic is fine for movie roles and the stage but in reality the need to attempt to twin with a celebrity filled to the brim with fillers seems to have spiralled out of control.

However, if anyone chooses this route, I’ll not judge them as it’s damned confusing when we feel and think younger, yet we face that person in the mirror without their glossy trimmings, and they look like the grumpy old man or woman we’ve been trying to keep out… (said with a petrified pout I promptly tried to turn into an upturned Samantha simper)…

I also blame some influencers. WHY are people following them like the second coming, taking every post and word as gospel? Too many of them don’t do their homework and research, and as they are set on fame and often driven by greed, they’ll promote anything that pays them well. Do they share with followers when things go wrong and the possible long-term damage that could ensue by their actions? Responsible posting, especially when one has a large following, is key. Keep it real. Please.

Yes, tripping over the sorry souls who have decided we no longer matter as we have silver tresses and our interesting stories spanning over decades are of zero importance to them, is also a reality. Realising we have nothing to prove as we’ve paid our dues, and still pay our taxes, we focus on savouring every moment of living. In the end, our tribe finds us!

The beautiful Paulina, former super-model, mother, rocker widow, and survivor, wears her emotional scars, grey tresses and facial lines like a crown of honour. She wrote a book about her journey and is part of a select group of women who are once again hitting the headlines and the catwalk for embracing their age and ageing honestly and graciously. She still looks fabulous in a bikini too!

I was outraged when I saw how vile some women were in response to her Instagram posts, reflecting her facial lines and silver-grey hair. Her hashtag of “between Jlo and Betty White,” is so relevant now. Her response was gracious but I’m certain these women, who obviously have no respect for others and less for themselves, had hurt her deeply.

I agree with her response of: “I don’t know how I’m supposed to look at my age. I only know how I look now.” I salute her and my response to those nasty crones? Karma is not a beach, and when she strikes, it’s vicious.

Being ageless in our minds, keeping the old person out, laughing as often as possible, every day, smiling at strangers, smiling at people we adore, and smiling inwardly about our ageing journey is a privilege.

I’m off to my yoga session, where we are constantly reminded by our lovely yoga coach Tee at Soul Essence Yoga in Mt Eliza to, “unclench the jaw, relax the face, just focus on your breath.” After the class, I have a renewed spring in my step, realising all my limbs and joints are still in working order, albeit at times a tad stiff. Celebrating our proof of life? It takes practise… be careful of a negative facial expression when that clock strikes (said with outrageous, self-deprecating chuckles).

Out and about

I often feature the scenic drives through vineyards, hills and along the spectacular oceanfront of the Mornington Peninsula but sometimes a change is truly as good as a holiday and playing hooky for a day, indulging in a leisurely drive to my old stomping ground, Mount Dandenong and its surrounds, commonly known as The Dandenongs (not to be confused with the suburb Dandenong), proved how a day-vacation could be balm for the soul. I was in great company and playing tour guide for a special visitor from abroad.

It was a misty day and knowing the cloud would be thicker at the top of the mountain, where pretty Olinda nestles in the forest, our little party stopped for a delicious chai latte and hearty beef pie, fries and a fresh garden salad at Olinda Café, ideal on a chilly day. My friends declared the butternut soup a triumph too, whilst our shared lemon meringue pie was a zesty burst of sunshine on a chilly day.

Afterwards, we meandered down the winding roads through quaint Sassafras, and further down the misty mountain to Belgrave, where we’d just missed the historical little steam train on narrow gauge departing from Puffing Billy station. Stepping into history that is preserved with care for future generations is always heart-warming and our visitor seemed thrilled with the scenic surrounds, forestry, and picturesque little towns dotted along our route, vowing to relocate here soon!

Pictured above, dining at Olinda Cafe, and not drinking and driving on a misty Mount Dandenong.

Pictured above, scenes from Puffing Billy Station in Belgrave, featuring friends Rika and Barend, and a kookaburra.

Yabby Lake Vineyard on the Mornington Peninsula

My dear friend and I had a starter to share, beetroot cured salmon with orange, fennel, and dill; beef pie with kale and a butternut reduction; cassoulet comprising pork belly, duck leg confit, Italian pork sausage, haricot beans, Emmental cheese, and herb crumb; with the dark chocolate cherry mousse cake, macerated cherries, and mascarpone as a finale.

It was delicious but the kale was tough as an old boot and be warned, prices at most wineries are higher than on the seafront or even in the city. It’s great for a special occasion or if you have a generous budget for dining out.

Pictured above, dining at Yabby Lake Vineyard in Tuerong on the Mornington Peninsula.

Meeting special friends at Blue Train in Southbank for a day out in the city was a treat. Melbourne is a multi-cultural city and the stylish urban crowd, sophisticated eateries, impressive architecture of the old fused with modernity. Strolling along the Yarra River is always a joy. Crossing the river on the impressive Pedestrian Bridge or the Princes Bridge to South Bank, rates up there with some of the most revered cities of the world.

My choice of pan-seared salmon accompanied by honey-glazed heirloom carrots, broccolini pesto potatoes and crumbled feta was pure delight.

Pictured above, a wood duck in a fountain, dining at Blue Train in Southbank, and scenes of Melbourne on a misty day.

Only a few days later, my dear friend Rika and I travelled into the city for dinner at Waterfront in Southbank, where my white snapper pie arrived with an authentic French crust on top, laden with fish and veg in a creamy sauce, and bursting with flavour. For a moment I imagined being back in Paris, overlooking the Seine, dining on creamy French cuisine. This is Melbourne, though, and the view of the Yarra River, the cosmopolitan ambience and friendly smiles from passers-by did just fine!

Pictured above, dining at Waterfront in Southbank, and Melbourne city by night.

Why did I make two city trips in one week? Who could resist a Brazilian Jazz concert with Carlos Ferreira and his group presenting The Golden Years of Brazilian Music at the Melbourne Recital Centre, with plenty old and new favourites but no Girl from Ipanema, which I found slightly disappointing.

I’ve not traversed the city by night for some time and the trendy vibe, friendly locals and tourists strolling along the river, stopping to peruse restaurant dining menus, and cocktail bars both on the river and along Southbank, again proved this to be a most liveable city.

Back on the Mornington Peninsula, fancy an authentic gelato in Frankston or a delicious Italian sweetie? Pop into Lavezzi, it’s like being a kid in a lolly shop and stepping into modern Italy with the quirk of a bygone era, complete with a lifelike mural of the Amalfi Coast. Take the kids, set them loose on the confectionery, and Mom and Dad could have a quiet night sofa bingeing when the little rascals come off that sugar high much later! Take a stroll down to the beachfront and watch the city across the bay in the distance, or marvel at the loveliness of Oliver’s Hill and Frankston Pier.

Pictured above, Lavezzi in Frankston, and driving between Mornington and Mt Martha, with a view of the city across the bay.

A view to a kill – spring safari at Tau in South Africa

Fancy a sustainable safari destination, malaria-free, with eco-friendly values, prolific wildlife, the Big Five and all the smaller animals in-between, with some 27 major game species roaming free in this natural habitat? Welcome to five-star Tau Game Lodge in the Madikwe Game Reserve in South Africa, which borders the wilds of Botswana.

Then there is the birdlife. From grey and blue herons, kingfishers, fish-eagles, and the like, to migrating birds such as spur-winged geese, choosing this haven as their annual breeding home. A sanctuary of freedom to over 250 different bird species, safari birding could not get any better.

The endangered African wild dog, respected for its community-oriented spirit, has been breeding successfully in the Reserve for many years. Observing the pups play is equally thrilling to watching lion and cheetah cubs get up to mischief here, where game roam free.

Guests savouring a bush dinner in the Tau Boma overlooking the world-famous waterhole recently reported a lion kill at the waterhole! The lodge’s live webcam captured this spectacle too, when the Chaba pride killed a wildebeest, after which a female not of the same pride, stopped by for a drink with her cubs for some playtime – and a free meal! An elephant delicately stepped around the feasting cats, unperturbed by the event, followed by a giraffe dropping in for a sundowner…

All the chalets, including the standard chalets, offer sublime vistas of the waterhole, which envelopes the lodge.

Pictured above: The infinity pool at Tau Game Lodge and its cocktail bar overlooking the waterhole, and a recent scene of a kill at the waterhole.

The 24/7 Tau live webcam is pure armchair safari heaven at: http://taugamelodge.co.za/main-lodge/live-webcam/

See more at: www.taugamelodge.co.za

Sofa binges

Prime:

Operation Fortune with a full star cast, including Carey Elwes, Jason Statham, Aubrey Plaza, Hugh Grant, and Josh Hartnett (so pleased he is back in action)! Released this year. Slick, stylish, action-packed, funny, witty, with great locations, ranging from LA to Morocco, directed by Guy Ritchie.

Half Moon Street, released in 1978, stars Michael Cain and Sigourney Weaver. Picture Pretty Woman with a PhD from Harvard living in Notting Hill Gate. Political chess.

Apple TV:

Shrinking, a limited new series, starring Harrison Ford and Jason Segel. Loved the punchy one-liners and Mr Ford is proving a delightful comic, smartly side-stepping the ridiculous grandfather roles Robert De Niro has opted for in his senior years. I giggled like a teen at quips such as: “I’m a white guy in Pasadena. Cops will probably just take my car to my house,” said when parking illegally on a pavement. Not PC but hilarious.

Netflix:

This new release of 2023, Heart of Stone, stars Gal Gadot and Jamie Dornan. MI6, arms dealers, double-crossers, stunning locations, and Glen Close in a suit! Perhaps Gal should be the new Bond? I was thinking Jamie but Gal has serious action chops!

SBS:

The Chaperone, released in 2001, starring Elizabeth McGovern, is based on Louise Brooks, a dancer and actress of the 1920s. A delightful turn of events, wink-wink…

Focus on Bill Nighy, Wild Target released in 2010, also starring the talented Emily Blunt. A feel-good comedy about an assassin falling in love with a nutty beauty.

A touch of Oscar Wilde is always fun, and The Importance of Being Ernest, released in 2002, starring Colin Firth, Edward Fox, Judy Dench, and Reese Witherspoon, did not disappoint.

Binge:

I got hooked on Wild Scandinavia, with nature at its most beautiful and wild, sometimes cruel, the ebb and flow of tidal sand flats, fjords, majestic rocks, and massive mountains, proved pure armchair escapism.

Style

Changing of the season

Still in winter but layering for mutable temperatures daily, with a slight scent of spring in the air on sunny days, I’m focusing on basic items that are versatile and ideal for layering.

In other parts of the world, many are now preparing for autumn, and for once we are on a similar track, styling for early autumn and a late spring. Black and white basics work agelessly, so does camel. Add colour, or keep it monochromatic or neutral, whatever the mood.

Coats, wraps, ponchos, scarves, and jackets do the trick to keep the chill out. Styling made easy, whilst a knitted dress and a sleeveless woollen dress will serve us endlessly. Worth the ageless fashion investment.

Pictured above: Note the basic items and colours, adding layers, texture and pops of colour as we please for versatile style. The spring items featured in the last row are from Evaless and comprise, left to right: V-neck long leopard print T-shirt dress https://bit.ly/46UK0G8 – SKU: LC6114505-20-S; Flamingo Floral V Neck Casual Dresses https://bit.ly/3rw9HNc
SKU: LC6117161-10-S; Pink Floral Print Casual T-Shirt https://bit.ly/3NRw8E5 SKU: LC25218270-1-S – see @evalessofficial for up to 60% off+free gift+worldwide shipping – use code: Real20

For more detailed outfits, styling and brands on promotion, follow me on Instagram @Sixty_is_the_new_40 and see my latest monthly style article at: https://startsat60.com/media/opinion/bloggers/making-the-most-of-our-body-type-with-style

Cheers to the goodlife, and to savouring every moment of entering this new season, be it autumn or spring –  it’s proof of life…

by Tilly Smith Dix

Winter colds are never predictable and opting for natural healing products, including plenty vitamin C, ginger, Manuka honey, and the necessary paracetamol or ibuprofen when in discomfort, seemed a good choice. Buying local produce, such as Manuka honey, sustains our economy.

Speaking of which, I was looking at my home economy budget and felt a tad concerned, given the rising costs of everything, including energy!

Then, there’s a knock at my door. I leave the security door locked, having perused the stranger at my door on my video doorbell first, and he is wearing a badge.

He advises me he is from EcoCare Carbon Solutions, a company contracted by the local Victoria State Government to perform energy-saving upgrades in my neighbourhood.

I’m suspicious. What would they do to my home? Would I let a stranger into my house, claiming to be doing such wonderful things, replacing the ceiling extraction fans in the bathroom, toilet, and utility room? Why, pray, would they do that at no cost to me?

Simple. The new technology shuts the outlet of the fan, which goes into the roof, and this prevents dust and cold air from entering the house through the vents!

“Seriously, this government will provide me with this upgrade at no cost, to save me money on heating my home this winter,“ I ask. “Yes,” Bobby the project manager for my area assures me.

He advises me his company will also replace the seals around my external doors to keep my home draught-free for further energy saving.

When I moved into my little home a few years ago, I spent many hours traversing the aisles of Bunnings, looking for idiot-proof door seals, which I diligently stuck to my front door, yet, still, when that alpine breeze blows from the Victorian Highlands, or the bay, especially after a snow drop, I felt the chill.

Never fear, Bobby’s here, and he suggested I take a picture of his official badge and urged me to check his company out online, as well as the Victoria Energy Upgrade plan as he assured me, he would not invite any stranger with a story like his into his home either. He would send a team member the following day, a Saturday, to do the job, which takes fifteen minutes, he said.

I went online, perused the process, and yes, Bobby and his crew were legit. The pleasant tradie who arrived the following day took off his boots at my front door out of respect for my home, and he was efficient, friendly, and fast. Gone in exactly fifteen minutes! He also left his workspace spotless. Wow!

Suffice to say, I absolutely feel the difference! Therefore, not only will I save on heating my little home during winter, but also on cooling it in summer! Oh, and I also, as a senior citizen, received payment, same as last year, on my domestic energy spend. That payout equals groceries for two weeks. Not shabby.

No government is perfect as they comprise people with different opinions, egos, and principles. However, I’m not complaining as I honestly feel I have a voice here, and a government that does care about its people. Welcome to Australia, land of milk and Manuka honey – and on a quest to save energy!

The Upside of anger

I’ve noticed constant anger and ever-brewing frustration on social media. The world is catering to narcissism and disrespect. We are all human and not long ago I succumbed to a toxic trap, set by someone with no regard for women, and less than zero tolerance for people their senior, or the facts of the matter.

I must admit, I lost my cool and set them straight with the truth. In retrospect, being brutally honest was a bad choice as one must realise when it is futile to communicate with chauvinists. Then I remembered my wise late dad’s words, “it’s foolish to argue with a fool.”

Toxic people will always be there to trial and test us. Don’t commune with the hemlock of the humankind. In nature it is poison, in humans it stains. Never too old to learn and when to step away. Be cool… and a note to self, nobody could drive you mad unless you give them the keys. Amen to that, said with a manic giggle…

Frankston Arts Centre

I remember watching replays of Australia’s Got Talent, when a sixteen-year-old tenor, Mark Vincent, won the competition in 2009. I was blown away by his voice, so young, yet a talent that would compare favourably with world-renowned tenors.

I also remembered the voice of Mario Lanza, a singer my parents loved when I was a child. I remember seeing The Student Prince on a once-a-month movie night with my folks back in the day. As a child, the music and location of Heidelberg, Germany, impressed me and years later, when I visited that scenic city, I remembered the movie and my parents with great fondness.

Yes, I digress but there are things that should be shared. So, I recently got to see Mr Vincent perform at my local arts centre, with the gorgeous soprano Julie Lea Goodwin. They performed highlights from Phantom of the Opera, Les Miserables, and a selection of sweet music that would withstand the test of time.

Mark will be touring the US shortly, and whilst I hope he gets the accolades and audiences he so richly deserves, I hope they don’t snap him away from Aussie for too long! He has toured with the internationally celebrated Welch songstress Katherine Jenkins in the past and frankly, I’m surprised David Foster, who also produced music for Ms Jenkins, did not sign Mark up for an album. Watch this space… Go Aussie, go Mark!

Tipples and Dining

The Rocks in Mornington is located next to the Mornington Pier and shares space with the yacht club. If the tide got too high one might get your feet wet. My point? It’s a happy place for me and having reviewed it in the past, I gave it a miss for some time, but I do visit the pier often as it’s one of my soul places here on the Mornington Peninsula.

GREAT news, the menu has been refreshed and my dear friend Rosaria and I celebrated our first meeting at this restaurant almost four years ago, when her and her husband Sisto happened to be dining at the table next to mine! We started chatting that day, like kindred spirits, and the friendship has grown into the best kind, that of people who choose to become family, more joyful stitches in this tapestry of life.

We opted for the smaller portions on this celebratory day, designed for sharing, which is always fun and our choices of kingfish crudo with a mild green curry sauce, Skull Island prawns grilled in a spicy marinade, and duck spring rolls were delicious. I’ll be back to sample the other new menu options… soon!

Pictured above, Skull Island tiger prawns, king fish crudo, and duck spring rolls at The Rocks, Mornington.

Counting House in Mornington, which I reviewed about a year ago, is always a good option. Formerly a bank, complete with the old bank vault and historical counter, the decorative play on its past infused with modernity, makes for a delightful ambience and the food is fabulous.

This time I opted to meet my dear friend Rika for brunch and it was a triumph. The service was friendly and efficient, not to mention my delicious poached salmon eggs benedict. A refreshing walk to Mornington Pier afterwards on a breezy winter’s day proved just the ticket to clear any cobwebs on a Sunday.

Pictured above: Poached salmon eggs benedict at Counting House, a gull outside The Rocks, and a view of Mornington Beach.

Lona Hotel in Frankston is home to the classiest cocktail bar in Frankston. Repurposed with respect to its origins as one of the oldest buildings in Frankston, with modern quirk, my friends and I were delighted by this venue. Fancy a pornstar martini? It contains passion fruit. Go figure, Mr Bond, it’s shaken, not stirred… delicious!

Pictured above, cocktails at Lona Hotel, street art, and Frankston Pier on a choppy winter’s day in Frankston.

Travel

Need to escape on a luxury, authentic safari, where over twenty-seven major species of game roam free, with all of them frequenting a large waterhole, which is surrounded by the lodge accommodation and hospitality areas? An animal kingdom where humans are elevated within the lodge areas for safety but with sublime vistas of the never-ending animal parade …

This is also a place where migrating and native birdlife establish their territory around the water, making for a year-round birders’ paradise…

Welcome to Tau Game Lodge, a five-star safari gem situated on the far northern border of South Africa, in the malaria-free Madikwe Game Reserve, bordering Botswana. Madikwe is the fourth largest game reserve in the country.

Pictured above and below: A Nile crocodile suns itself at the Tau waterhole, with Egyptian geese and plovers keeping a safe distance, and a Standard Luxury Chalet at Tau facing the waterhole.

To quote a recent guest to Tau: “Our game ranger knew his turf and not only did his knowledge of the game, their proximity and habits impress us, but also his respect for the bush in allowing the creatures of the wild their space.  Within minutes, we were photographing bull elephants, delicately foraging, and breakfasting on new green flora after the rains, followed by white rhino and offspring.”

Being captivated by the pecking order at the waterhole, right up to twilight, when reflections in the water of game parading at cocktail hour make for magical photographic memories, is highly addictive.

The plentiful game ranges from the Big Five to spotted and brown hyena, buffalo, leopard, zebra, jackal, to the endangered African wild dog, and plenty more. The large variety of antelope includes impala, springbok, kudu, waterbuck, eland, blesbok, nyala, sable and wildebeest. Giraffe, ostrich, and warthog, together with an array of smaller mammals, are amongst the magnificent animals that roam the reserve.

The reserve is also populated with over 250 bird species. This makes for a world-class, memorable safari at Tau Game Lodge.

Conservation at Tau

Tau management is constantly striving to reduce its carbon footprint and one of the most recent developments is to eliminate the use of plastic water bottles. Guests are provided with reusable water bottles on arrival, which can be refilled at various water stations situated around the guest chalets and the lodge.

Take advantage of the current special packages on offer, see more at www.taugamelodge.co.za – and the Tau live webcam is pure armchair heaven at: http://taugamelodge.co.za/main-lodge/live-webcam/

Capturing special moments on camera for generations

Photographer Jessica Apap, with whom I had the pleasure of working several years ago on a modelling gig, loves LOVE and she is focused on photographing weddings and families, especially moms and their broods, which has now organically flowed into grandparents with their children and grandbabies too. Jess is a gorgeous person and superb photographer. Check her out at: www.madforyoucreative.com if you are based in or around Melbourne.

Sofa binges

Apple TV: Coda got three Oscar nominations several years ago and I remember watching the awards show, which was deeply emotional. Want to cry, laugh, understand the world of people born without hearing, and enjoy happy endings? Don’t miss this one. The authenticity of the movie is further confirmed by the brilliant deaf actress Marlee Matlin, still gorgeous, and be blown away by Emilia Jones. No spoiler alerts, just watch it.

What I dislike about Hijack, starring Idris Alba, is having to wait for the next weekly episode of this mini-series! Don’t watch this gripping drama if you plan on going on a long flight soon, (said with big, frightened eyes and a nervous chuckle)!

Binge: A Man Called Otto, with the always stellar acting of Tom Hanks. Laugh, cry, learn, live life.

Bullet, starring the late great Steve McQueen and gorgeous Jacqueline Bissett, whom I interviewed years ago during her visit to South Africa, still ticks all the entertainment boxes.

Prime Video: Fancy Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan? I’m a huge fan and devoured all his books. John Krasinski as Ryan is a breath of fresh air. You can’t miss a moment, action-packed, edge of the seat entertainment in the final instalment of the series.

Dan Brown’s Inferno, starring Tom Hanks, remains a captivating adventure, from Florence to Istanbul. Location, location, location…

Netflix: The Last Vermeer is a clever play on forgeries and Nazi art snobbery, and how easy it is to part a fool from his money. Guy Pierce, Claes Bang and Vicky Krieps deliver sterling performances in post-war intrigue.

Read and learn

Splash It – by Caroline Hurry, my seasoned author friend, who is also a legendary travel writer.

Carrie has been toiling away non-stop, writing, and publishing her gems of wisdom, which I’ve reviewed on this blog in the past.

I’m always captivated by her writing and creative energy, and offered to give her a slot in this month’s blog, and this is what she sent me – this is how people support each other:

“Tilly, the impeccable way you have always conducted yourself in the three decades I’ve known you – outwardly elegant, inwardly the kindest, most supportive human ever – has taught me more about the right way to do PR and publicity …

“TillytheGoodlife newsletter is my monthly highlight – brimming with joie de vivre and bonhomie, everything a fab newsletter should be! Ditto your divine Sixty_is_the_new_40 Instagram feed to which I aspire! I LOVE seeing how you so effortlessly throw everything together!

“Watching you flourish in your new adopted country doing what you do and showing how life brims with glittering possibilities for anyone over 60 helped inspire Splash It! – a paint-by-paragraphs guide with nine customizable layout templates to get started on DIY marketing.”

Splash It! stands for Share, Participate, Launch, Announce, Showcase, Host, Introduce, and Troubleshoot –  all chapter titles offering customized exercises in each. 

A starting point for women with something to share about their home business or who want to market their skills or venue without the budget for a publicist, Splash It! takes the time-consuming guesswork out of how to craft a release, draft an introductory proposal, showcase a venue, host a familiarisation tour, troubleshoot with a letter of apology, or respond to an unfavourable venue review. Readers will also find a few Media Whispering tips inside. 

Pictured above, Splash It! (Hygge Books) goes live on August 1 on Amazon Kindle Australia for (Aus) $4.44 – paperback and hardcover available from August 5, 2023

Style and beauty

I was recently approached by Startsat60 online magazine to write a monthly article about style. My message in the article is clear: wear what you love and whatever makes you feel fabulous! And when it comes to shopping? Makes sure any new item will elevate at least three items in your closet. Longevity and good quality equals slow fashion, whereby style is key, yet we look fashionable. Just be you. See more at: https://startsat60.com/media/lifestyle/style/winter-wardrobe-bliss-the-therapeutic-joy-of-sorting-and-organising

Pictured above, versatile styling with a few basic items, from black to adding texture and colour, to neutral tones. Keep it monochromatic for an elongated, slimming appearance. I’m petite yet, these styles elongate me. For anyone with a fuller figure, using a pretty colour around the facial area will draw attention away from a neutral-palette outfit.

As for body shaming, to reiterate the women supporting women mantra, we don’t judge. Petite? Enjoy it! Plus-size? Embrace who you are! Medium size? Celebrate it! Cheers to the goodlife, and never forget to take time just for you… man or woman, beast or child, we all deserve time to rejuvenate…

By Tilly Smith Dix

The world recently lost an iconic artist, performer, survivor, and inspiring woman, Tina Turner. Forever the messenger of being Simply the Best, a rock goddess.

Shortly after her passing, I lost a beloved friend of many years, who had not only been my protector at times, but also my confidant, brother, special events brotherly date, and loyal friend.

During his memorial service, which I watched on YouTube, the heartfelt tributes from his family, friends, and staff deeply saddened me.

Most of the people paying homage to this force of nature, were people he had worked with and who had worked for him for many years. His business was his passion. Their love and respect for him seemed immeasurable, yet, I know many people, scattered around the world like me, would have been keen to share their memories of this man, who never claimed to be an angel, but he always stayed true to his heart, which he wore on his sleeve.

This got me thinking. We all, at some point past midlife, or even before, if we are wise, draw up our last will and testament. Don’t want undeserving people benefiting from our life-earnings, right?

Attached to this last will, should be a list of people we value in life, people who have meant a lot to us, people who gave us their time and love. Even when we differ in opinion, eventually, the good, respect, gratitude and love will rise to the top, and then we simply pick up where we had left off. Often, because of such misunderstandings, the bond is stronger afterwards as we have the additional link of pure honesty.

The music we love, the pets, and life-lessons we have treasured, should be mentioned too, as these aspects reflect the true picture of a soul that lived.

The folks planning that final celebration of our life don’t always know half of what we did or whom we had made an impact on in our lives, and never forget, they are in mourning, with their hearts shattered by the loss of their pillar of strength. Not sure about you but when I’m sad, I’m asinine.

Seriously, we must think about our dying wishes and how our loved ones should celebrate our life when we depart on that final journey. Often, our offspring have not attended enough funerals to grasp the importance of quoting some caring people that played major parts in a parent‘s life.

Therefore, make a list of those folks we would like to bid us bon voyage in that final departure lounge. Add their contact details to the list, as this then becomes a double celebration, widening the circle of love not just for the dearly departed but also for those who are left behind.

Last year my dear friend since childhood left this life too early, and for about two weeks after her final departure, I felt her presence. At first poignant, that presence around me became blithe after a few days. I could hear her laughter and see her eyes crinkling with glee. I still felt her spirit in my heart, but it was as if she’d moved on after those early weeks and I believed she had only wanted to reassure me she was in a happy place and for me not to cry for her anymore.

When our hearts ache, they ache. Just go with it. Cry. Listen to the music you know that soul adored and dance to those tunes if it makes you feel lighter. Just be in the moment and celebrate them.

Now, yet another dear friend, always kind to me, always helpful, loving and ever caring, has gone. Perhaps one of the few people who never wanted to change me and who adored me exactly the way I am, quirks and all.

We are never prepared for the impact on us when a loved one departs, someone who feels more like family than our own blood. At first, there is acceptance, knowing the only thing we are certain of in this world as that eventually we die… we remember the good times, we also remember times of strife, yet, the good memories always come to the fore, and more so when we know we loved and were loved.

Now, after some weeks since his departure, I feel the presence of my dear old friend, gone too soon after suffering ill health for several years, laughing at me, with me, and sharing stories down memory lane, and the sadness is lighter! Finally, realisation sinks in, he is now in a better place, with no pain, no stress, released from this (often), toxic world. It is time to let go…

So, my question, which could never be answered, I guess, would be: does a departed soul visit us, the ones who cared for them deeply, on a one-on-one tour, and once they know we are over the worst part of mourning, move on to their other loved ones to comfort them… or, do they have the ability to visit all of us, simultaneously, yet we feel uniquely singled out during this easing of our pain?

In the meantime, living a life that makes us happy is the only way to go forward. I’m ecstatic about my list of people and animals I have adored getting longer by the day… and in the end, saying goodbye with our hearts should not be a dying art.

So, out of respect for the family, whom I love like my own, I’ll not mention my darling friend, my gin buddy, by name, I’ll simply say: “Thanks for your enormous heart, your honesty, your larger-than-life personality, silly jokes, pranks, generosity, forgiveness, respect, support, protection, and enduring love. I can hear laughter as I imagine my friend Mariekie, a Taurus like you, already sharing stories and giggles with you up there.

“See you when my time comes, Goose, hope you’ll meet me at Arrivals with the tribe. However, in the meantime, every time I have a G&T, a glass of delicious bubbles, or sushi I’ll hear your laughter. Love you, I hope you have peace now as I see your handsome smile.”

Out and About

Winter is one of my favourite seasons. I love the winter sky, the moody bay, and the fact that tourists are not clambering to the Mornington Peninsula in droves when it’s chilly.

The dining spots I tested with some friends did not pan out as well as we’d hoped but the company was always delightful.

So it was that on a chilly Sunday, I treated myself to a scrumptious freshly baked donut from Big Buns Burgers & Donut Co on Benton’s Square in Mount Martha. The fresh full cream and locally produced jam topping, on a bun of pure delight, melting in my mouth from my clifftop vantage point overlooking Mornington seemed a fitting way in which to reflect, and bid a final farewell to my dearly departed old buddy. I’m certain he’d have approved of my celebrating his life with this delicious indulgence, and the celestial view of the bay.

Pictured above, Mornington winter magic, with Melbourne on the horizon (top right).

Frankston Arts Centre

Celebrating the works of Gilbert and Sullivan, and other great composers, including Puccini, with pianist William Schmidt, tenor Roy Best and soprano Alison Jones, superbly narrated by Chris McKenna, was yet another Sunday afternoon spent in the most delightful way at this theatre on my doorstep. These lunchtime concerts are such a treat, add a snack and delicious local bubbles from the bar, and it’s a special event! If you live anywhere near the Mornington Peninsula, check the website for upcoming world-class entertainment, www.artscentre.frankston.vic.gove.au

Sofa Binges

Seven/7 free to air: Edge of Love, about the complicated love life of Welsh poet Dylan Thomas. Who could forget Do not go gentle into that good night… Well, he did not go gently into that good night of love and certainly lived on the edge of it. Superb performances by Matthew Rhys, Keira Knightly, and Sienna Miller. Wartime intrigue.

Binge: The story of Donna Summer, her two marriages, time in Germany, her restless, wildly creative spirit, resulting in painting on canvas when she stepped away from performing.

Mrs Harris Goes to Paris, with Lesley Manville, Isabelle Hubert, and Lucas Bravo (of Emily in Paris fame). Delightful, a story about a London cleaning woman realising her dream in 1957.

Huge Homes in Britain, from Surrey to Scotland, comprising transforming a Victorian red brick water tower, and a derelict cathedral, into a luxe home, not to mention some quirk, including little ghosts wearing red socks.

Rick Stein’s Cornwall, is pure bliss. Of course, this is his home county and where he has his world-renowned restaurant in Padstow. I particularly enjoy the authentic characters he spends time with, and his focus on local produce, not to mention the exquisite seafood, from the Atlantic straight to the plate. Cornwall and Devon have always held a special romantic attraction for me and if you, like me, enjoy armchair travel of places you’ve visited or would still like to traverse, this series ticks all the boxes.

Of course, not being a royalist, I was rather miffed when he mentioned a chat he had with the late Prince Phillip, who told him, “I enjoy your cooking programmes but when you start philosophising, I switch off!” How rude. Entitled and arrogant.

Oh, he also told Rick Stein he’d not eat the chef’s food as he’d probably have to spit it out! What? That departed royal could have acquired some grace from Mr Stein, I reckon. Having had some communications with Rick and his lovely Aussie wife Sass in the past, I attest they are nice, gracious people.

Prime Video: The Rose Garden, starring Liv Ulman, Peter Fonda, and Maximilian Schell. How a child murdering Nazi thought he could get away with his actions when the British troops were only six kilometres away.

On the lighter side, still on Prime, I watched The Thomas Crown Affair – twice. Yes, I remember going to my first grown-up movie in my teens and on a date approved by my father. Dinner and a movie, dressed up in a Mary Quant-style knitted winter dress and heels. Oh my, how starstruck I was about Steve McQueen and Faye Dunaway! As for the now evergreen Windmills of Your Mind theme score?

So I binged on the original filmed in 1968 again, as well as the remake of the movie of 1999 starring Pierce Brosnan and Rene Russo, which was titillating … I loved how the original theme song was performed by Sting in this remake. Both movies still score a ten from me. Elegant, jazzy, sexy, sassy, and Faye appearing in the remake, this time as Mr Crown’s therapist, was a great touch!

Apple TV: Still, the story of Michael J. Fox’s long, brave journey with Parkinson’s Disease. Michael and his family are trailblazers in supporting research and finding a cure for this debilitating illness, yet they remain light of spirit, and often hilarious. I found this documentary deeply touching, as my darling mom suffered from this awful disease, which stripped her of her dignity towards her life’s end. Michael J. Fox and his family’s positive attitude prevented me from tearing up too much.

Travel

Safari in style in South Africa

I mostly write my own copy when it comes to the always wonderful Tau Game Lodge in the Madikwe Game Reserve of South Africa. However, I was captured by this extract from David Batzofin’s blog after his recent review visit to my favourite 5-star safari lodge:

“Did you know? Jackals are cooperative, cunning hunters. They are opportunistic omnivores who will cooperatively hunt small antelope and eat reptiles, insects, ground-dwelling birds, fruits, berries, and grass.

“Interesting fact #213: Fossil deposits have revealed them as one of the oldest known dog species, which has remained pretty much unchanged since the Pleistocene epoch around 2.5 million years ago…”

Pictured above, a black-backed jackal spotted during a Tau safari, image by David Batzofin.

Note: See more about David’s safari at Tau through his superb lens at https://travelandthings.co.za/2023/06/game-drive-sightings-from-tau-game-lodge-madikwe/

… and more about the current rates and services on offer at www.taugamelodge.co.za

Pictured above, a Standard Room at Tau overlooking the waterhole; and right, a lioness expresses her disdain for humans observing her from a Tau safari vehicle, picture by Clint Austin.

The sweet life in Sicily

The scenic Italian island of Sicily is best known for its architectural treasures, and the origins of the cosa nostra. However, there is so much more to discover on the diverse island, from its unspoilt southwest coast, to sheltered sandy beaches, glittering vistas of the Mediterranean Sea, white cliffs, endless golden sand dunes, and a sanctuary of biodiversity in its wetlands.

Pictured above, Adler Spa Resort Sicilia and some of the scenic sights and ruins nearby.

See more at www.adler-resorts.com

Planning a budget for travel

How to Budget – a Comprehensive Guide provides readers with valuable tips and tools for managing their finances through budgeting. The article emphasises the importance of tracking expenses, setting financial goals, and prioritising spending. With helpful resources like budgeting apps and spreadsheets, this guide is a must-read for anyone looking to improve their financial wellness. Contact Elvira Camargo for further information at ecamargo@annuity.org

Personal driver on the Mornington Peninsula

Attending an event on the Peninsula and smart enough not to drive after too many celebratory drinks? I know a man. Call Sisto Bernardo at 0418 109 581 – tell him I sent you, and thank me when you arrive alive.

Style and beauty

Skincare

Several IG followers have requested I share my skin regime again. I keep it simple. I wear sunscreen even if I’m walking outside in winter. I use a cleansing milk with warm water at night to cleanse my face, and a gentle eye-makeup remover from Lancome. I use the Lancome Micellar water, followed by rosewater as a toner after cleansing my skin morning and night. At night I use a double serum eye cream from Clarins, and a triple serum from Lancome as a night cream. In the morning I splash my face with warm water, followed by cold water, before applying the gentle toner – I never use any product containing alcohol on my face. Then I apply an eye lifting cream from Clarins and a lifting day cream, also by Clarins.

Once a week I use a gentle Lancome exfoliating wash, followed by a hydrating mask by Lancome, which I sometimes sleep with if my skin feels a little dry, and always an eye cream.

I don’t do Botox but I’m not against it. I just don’t enjoy seeing how too many people don’t seem to know where to draw the line, resulting in the flip-side of beauty, grotesque. Keeping it real is just easier.

I use a gentle exfoliating body wash once a week, and always use body lotion rich in vitamin E. We can’t stop ageing but we could slow down the appearance of ageing, (said with theatrical eye-roll, as the struggle is real).

Warming winter style

Earth tones are back in vogue and as far as I’m concerned, they never left! However, depending on our mood and the weather, it’s our job to up the ante, by wearing exactly what makes us feel fabulous.

Already a tad bored with monochrome in camel, black or brown? Add warm red, pink, or go for sky blue or yellow! It elevates an outfit, plus, it gets you noticed if that’s what you’re going for, but in a chic way, naturally. Feeling great is the focus and it’s personal.

I’ve mixed up some colours and textures to add spark and personality to some of my old basics. As for those naysayers, believing women of a certain age should stick to always being understated? Never! We dress for us and if you don’t like what we wear, you don’t need to be in our sphere.

Not everyone has the knack to style their closet successfully, so, frankly, when in doubt, contact a reputable style consultant to assist you in selecting timeless pieces that will enhance your wardrobe. It’s also easier on the budget. Creating versatile style with basic items, such as pants, skirts, dresses, jackets, coats, shirts, and knitwear, by adding accessories, such as scarves, belts, shoes, and earrings, is the answer to having fun with our wardrobe.

Feel free to contact me for more information regarding styling and stylists via my Instagram fashion page @Sixty_is_the_new_40 – just embrace being you!

Pictured above: Mixing colours, textures, and silhouettes,  from monochrome to elongate a petite frame to colour to lift the mood, add personality and warmth.

Cheers to the goodlife, let’s never forget to tell folks we love them while they are still on this earth, but be authentic. We can’t love everybody…